Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Kiss the Dead Book 21 Written by: Laurell K. Hamilton

Well, here we are again, another Anita Blake book, and another year of my life gone... and well what do I have to say? What can I say? Where do we go from here? Due to the fact I have been reading these books for more than half my life, I will try in respect to be gentle. I waited for this book with low expectations mostly because of how the last book ended. I know a lot of people would say "well you are not being mature, you cannot handle the maturity of their relationship, it's not your story!" To those folks I say... It's time to realize the Story is on life support! Laurell K. Hamilton, once I worshiped her as my God. I loved the world she created, I loved Anita hence Blake in this book reviewers title...hell, Anita taught me to love being 5'3 dark haired and dark eyed. She taught me to want to be an independent bad ass, and okay I can understand if the Anita character has to grow up and mature after all she started at age 23 and finally hit 30, mind you this series is over a decade old, but ok. Now, the book...well the plot that was given to us the readers and what was on the jacket inside cover was non-existent, I don't think that loose plot point was even remotely important except for the last few pages. Even then we could have made something up. In my last Anita review I said Laurell's writing was like a Kevin Smith movie, a whole lot of talk, very little action, well this time she took it even a step further and it was a whole lot of internal dialogue whole lotta nothing else. If I have to hear how "Men get that look in their eyes, I'm a petite women and men feel threatened and don't respect me, I'm short, the color of Jean Claude's eyes, or Fuck, Fuck, Fuck,..." one more time it will be oh too soon. Thankfully there were not any new men in the bed this time, but there was also a lack of some of the men a lot of us readers have come to love. My friend and I think if Laurell could just put a description index of each character she could focus a whole hell of a lot more time on the actual plot. There was a plot just pushing trying to exist in all of that internal boring repetitive dialogue. After 21 books we get it! Micah has kitty eyes, Nathaniel's scent is vanilla, Jean Claude's eyes are oh so dark, Asher's scars are hidden behind a curtain of perfect golden hair, etc... etc.. etc.. and oh Anita we get it you're petite! Guess what 5'3 isn't that short, how do I know this? Because I am 5'3 and I don't need to stand on tip toe to kiss my 6'4 husband and we function just fine in life. I cannot believe I once worshiped this series. I still love the world Laurell built and I still love a lot of her characters even though spoiler... Jason, Zane, Cherry, Edward,  etc... just have vanished, she brought back a lot of the humans and added a domestic bliss that wasn't there before, but the action is just gone. Even the action scenes were so short and boring I couldn't get into this book. Also, the editor needs to be fired grammar errors everywhere! And, I am not that good of a writer, but a few times I would read a sentence and go...oh no, no, no... also copy and paste were obvious in a few places too, and a few facts about characters were changed. How do I know? Because she describes every characters in every book in full detail. I am not breaking up with this series, no, I am too long into this series and love Laurell's characters too much Jean Claude, Micah, Nathaniel, Jason, Edward, etc... to simply walk away, I can only hope Laurell gets her mojo back and can learn to write as awesome as she once did back in Guilty Pleasure through Obsidian Butterfly days...and oh perhaps Anita can stop being so damn abusive when every single lover and friend fears that "look in your eyes on your face" and fears you are going to drop them flat, and punish them maybe just maybe you're the one with the problem and maybe its time to really make progress and stop as Anita said so many times "poking at a good thing" So kiss the dead... I did not love it, or even overly like it, but I will wait for the next all the same.

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